Every time a new episode of Ted Lasso drops, I wonder the same question: Is Ted Lasso putting leadership coaches out of a job?

Not quite. But Season 4 of the hit Apple streaming show has delivered some of the most practical, useful leadership moments the show has ever given us and they deserve more study by all leaders today.

What Ted Lasso does, episode after episode, is model the kind of empathetic leadership that most organizations claim to want and most managers struggle to practice. Not because they don’t care, but because nobody taught them how or they are following some outdated playbook. The show makes it look effortless which it is absolutely not. But it is learnable.

Here are four lessons, especially from Season 4, worth bringing back to work.

TIP 1: WIN OVER YOUR SKEPTIC WITH CURIOSITY, NOT FORCE

Season 4’s most compelling new character is Alice Chilton, played by Tanya Reynolds . She is a sharp, exacting, some may say uptight interim head coach who Ted displaces when he arrives to lead the Lady Greyhounds. She had hoped to get the head coaching job herself. Instead she got a boss she didn’t ask for and didn’t want.

Most leaders faced with a resistant direct report do one of two things: try to win them over with charm or manage around them. Ted does neither. He gets curious. He learns Alice’s story : a promising career cut short by injury, deep expertise nobody asks her about, a drive to prove herself that presents as hostility. Rather than waiting for her to come around on her own (and, it should be noted, without giving up on her as others might be inclined to do), he sees the value in her unique perspective and even her ability to connect with the women in ways he and Coach Beard, his other male assistant coach, cannot. He’s not threatened by her professional experience on the pitch but sees it as a value add to help him succeed. So he pulls her in, invites her perspective, and makes space for her to lead.

When someone on your team is resistant, the first question is not “how do I get them on board?” It is “what am I not understanding about them yet?” And look deeper to find what value they add that may be missing. Get curious about resistance - it may provide powerful information.

TIP 2: SAY “YES AND…” INVITE COLLABORATION BEFORE YOU ISSUE DIRECTIVES

In Episode 7, Alice discovers the improv principle of “Yes, and” - the idea that you build on what someone else offers rather than shutting it down because then the scene can move forward. It tracks directly into her arc with Ted, where the entire season shows what happens when a leader creates space for someone to contribute rather than comply.

The “Yes, and” principle is one of the most underused tools in leadership. It does not mean agreeing with everything. It means treating ideas as building blocks rather than proposals to be approved or rejected. "Yes, but …”shuts down the conversation. “Yes, and …” signals that your thinking matters here and that we’re on the same team. And that signal turns your biggest skeptics, like Alice, into your biggest supporters.

At your next team meeting, try replacing “yes, but” with “yes, and” for one hour. Notice what shifts, both in strategic momentum and the energy in the room.

TIP 3: SIT WITH PEOPLE IN THEIR STRUGGLE WITHOUT SOLVING IT

Episode 8 delivers what I consider to be the quintessential leadership moment. And where most leaders high in ego, low in EQ, or even well-intentioned ones who rush into problem-solving strike out. Alice breaks down in tears because of various calamities facing the team. Ted walks in and does something most leaders are terrible at. He sits next to her. He does not fix it, redirect to solutions, or reach for silver linings. He simply tells her she is allowed to be human. And then he tells the whole team the same thing, inviting room for all their emotion here. “There is crying in football,”he quips.

This is one of the hardest skills for high-achieving, results-oriented leaders to practice. The instinct when someone is struggling is to help them feel better as fast as possible, which is more about making the leader feel more comfortable in moving past the emotion rather than through it. And this is why empathy is anything but weak: it requires strength to stay through the discomfort, have the hard conversations, and stay grounded without defensiveness.

Feeling genuinely heard, not fixed or redirected, is what actually restores people’s capacity. And what builds trust.

Next time someone comes to you with a struggle, ask this phrase I share with all my clients: “Do you need me to see it, solve it, or support you?” Then honor whatever they say .

TIP 4: MODEL THE BELIEF BEFORE YOU ASK OTHERS TO FEEL IT

The season opens with the team adding their own lines to the iconic BELIEVE sign in the locker room to make it their own apart from the men’s team: First with the Post-it, “....and WIN!”and then later adding more: “BELIEVE and destroy,” “BELIEVE and like, have a nice day.” While funny, this is also the perfect example of what happens when a leader creates a culture where people feel safe enough to contribute and make something their own.

Ted does not demand buy-in. He models belief : in the team, the process, and each person’s capacity to grow. He does this so consistently and genuinely that it becomes contagious, even when under pressure. The BELIEVE sign doesn’t work because Ted put it up. It works because Ted earned the right to mean it and he allowed others to take ownership.

Culture is not the pretty poster on the wall, or the foosball tables, or the free lunches. It’s what you model in the room every single day. Your team will not believe in the mission because you told them to. They believe it because they watch you believe it, even when things get hard.

LEADERSHIP COACHES ARE NOT YET OUT OF A JOB

Ted Lasso is not putting leadership coaches out of a job. If anything, he is making the case for why the work matters, by showing millions of viewers what it actually looks like when someone does it well. And how they can adopt Both/And leadership to be both empathetic and drive championship results at the same time.

The gap between knowing these principles and practicing them under pressure is where real leadership development lives. And, yes, coaches can help with that, challenging you and holding you accountable. Ted makes it look effortless when it is anything but. But every clumsy, imperfect attempt moves you closer to the leader your team needs.

Your team doesn’t need you to be Ted Lasso. They just need you to keep trying.