I’m genuinely confused. I’m confused why HBO’s Lanterns is taking such a bizarre approach to John Stewart’s origin story. I’m confused about the show’s handling of the Green Lantern rings and how Green Lanterns are chosen. And I’m confused why so many critics and fans are gushing about this show when it’s really . . . just supremely mid. Episode 3 has been the worst of the bunch so far .

Even as someone not steeped in Green Lantern lore, I know that this show is taking enormous liberties with how Green Lanterns are selected. The power rings have always chosen their Green Lantern and from the outset this was always someone fearless or, in Hal Jordan’s case, a man entirely without fear.

This concept matured somewhat in the early 2000’s when Geoff Johns began his run of Green Lantern: Rebirth comics. Johns reframed the idea in a way that made a lot of sense. Nobody is without fear entirely. It’s the willpower to act even when confronted with something that terrifies you that qualifies someone to be a Green Lantern. That’s what gets the ring to choose you.

The ring. Not the Guardians who set this whole thing up. Those blue-skinned aliens may be in charge of the Green Lantern Corps, but they don’t go down to planets and send green bubbles to sleeping people and ask them “Are you afraid?” after waking them up in the middle of the night. That’s just . . . the most bizarre, goofy way to recruit a hero I’ve ever seen. This show is trying very hard to be a Very Serious TV Show, but so much of the writing and setup is just incredibly silly.

In any case, this is what happens to John’s father, who is startled awake by a glowing green thing and doesn’t answer the question correctly. The ring goes to Hal instead. John’s dad is traumatized by the whole incident and it looks as though his wife might leave him when a woman appears. This is the same woman who we see John talking with in 2016, just before he ends up meeting Hal. She’s one of the Guardians, and John’s mom makes her prove it, giving us an interesting metamorphosis shot entirely from behind – less money spent on alien CGI, since faces are the most detailed part.

We soon learn that John’s mom is actually an insane person. When the Guardian tells her that her baby might be a good contender for Green Lantern someday, she doesn’t flinch. She doesn’t even stop to consider “Would this be good for my child?” or “Will this create division and resentment between him and his older brothers?” or . . . really any of the questions that a parent would almost certainly ask before devoting their own infant son’s life to truly monstrous nonsense like firing apples off his head William Tell style (his mom’s idea, we learn, not his dad’s) or making him walk home alone as a young boy through a seedy part of town.

I don’t like any of this. The change to how Green Lanterns are picked is one issue, but I also dislike the entire setup of John’s origin story and his ludicrous parents. I found the conversation between the mother and the Guardian extremely on-the-nose, with the mom acting really shocked that this alien from an entirely different planet didn’t understand the inequities Black people in America encountered.

Damon Lindelof’s previous superhero TV series, Watchmen , dealt with issues of race in ways that I found pretty compelling and interesting, but here they feel shoehorned in, a tacked on message that does little to further the plot or develop the characters.

I also dislike that Hal is portrayed as unworthy of the ring, though I suppose this story could play out in many different ways. Hopefully it’s not so on-the-nose, but the writing so far in this season has been so clunky and uneven, I’m just not sure what to expect.

There were other issues with this episode. John reveals that he was dishonorably discharged from the Marines for not completing his mission. This is another truly bizarre subplot. He’s sent as an assassin sniper to take out a bad guy at his remote compound. He parachutes in and then waits at the location for months for his quarry to arrive, all alone with no coms. Clearly, from the outset, from the moment they made him jump out of a plane in a massive storm, this mission was FUBAR. The only reason he doesn’t complete the mission is Hal showing up and arresting the bad guy before he could kill him.

It’s strange enough to send a solo Marine – even a spec ops Marine – on a mission like this, but to dishonorably discharge him for something he had no control over, when his mission itself was almost certainly illegal and top secret, just beggars belief.

The only part of this episode that I did like was when John rushed home to tell his horrible, psychopathic parents that he was finally recruited by the Guardians to take Hal’s place – and finds Hal sitting there at the table. The two go outside and after Hal pretends to be all friendly with him, he reveals that he actually has no intention of ever giving up the ring and is not going to place nice. It seems pretty likely that he knows the Guardians are trying to push him out. And you know what? Good for Hal. I like both John and Hal and actors Aaron Pierre and Kyle Chandler are both doing a great job, but I did not like this episode at all. Frankly, it’s a very strange choice to toss in a flashback episode just three episodes into the season, and make it almost entirely one long flashback, when it easily could have been condensed into just a few minutes.

Also, what the heck was up with that diamond? Seriously?

For now, I continue with Lanterns with a great deal of skepticism. This feels like a CW show cosplaying as a prestige HBO drama. I hope it gets better. What did you think?

Let me know on Twitter , Instagram , or Facebook . Also be sure to subscribe to my YouTube channel and follow me here on this blog . Sign up for my newsletter for more reviews and commentary on entertainment and culture.